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I need a permission slip

I'm very guilt-prone when it comes to writing. I saw a good quote not long ago, can't remember who it was from, that said that "Writing is the only thing that, when I do it, I don't feel like I should be doing anything else." These days, every time I do something, I feel like I should be writing.

Now, given my life the past year, I would think that I deserve a permission slip to stop writing for XXX amount of time. New baby? Check. Death of parent? Check. Serious illness of parent in law? Check. Having to put writing, and other interests, aside when having a child seems to be accepted as a postponement of writing. So why do I feel like I'm a slacker for not writing?

All I know is, I just can't write right now. In addition to taking care of a very active toddler, I also run a buisness (see death of parent). While I can do that from home, it is very difficult to get work time in during the day since she cries whenever I work on my computer. I'm serious. I thought it was because she didn't like being in her play area in my office, but when we were in a cabin in West Virginia a couple weeks ago, unless someone else was there to entertain her, she just got fussy every time I tried to do some computer work. It isn't like I am playing with her all the time, either. She lets me read and crochet and sometimes type on the keyboard on my phone (which is how I'm able to do this blog post. I do manage some work emails, but can't do accounting, drawings, invoicing, banking, etc, from here. I wish I could write from here, but when I'm keeping an eye on a toddler, I just can't focus enough to fall into a story. Especially when she's prone to coming over and grabbing at the keyboard, like she is doing now).

Now, in case anyone who wants to offer me a contract, I can manage to get things done...if there's a deadline. But for self-imposed deadlines, revisions, first drafts, of stories just for me...not happening.

So do I get a permision slip? Maybe until she's in preschool? I don't think it will make the guilt go away entirely, but maybe it would help.


( 3 comments — Leave a comment )
Aug. 25th, 2011 04:23 pm (UTC)
You have permission to not write.

You do not have permission to cease being awesome.

We don't need to see your identification. You may go about your business. Move along. Move along.
Aug. 25th, 2011 07:10 pm (UTC)
I agree with the above comment. :)

I think part of it is that we, as writers, hear all the time that there's a "right" way to be a writer, that you must write each and every day or at least carry a notebook around with you all the time. I don't do either of those. Yes, I want to write everyday, and yes, I think about writing every day, but I never have--but when I do write, I give it my all and often forget the rest of the world even exists.

So yes, hell yes I think you get a pass. It does not diminish your status as a REAL writer. Other jobs give vacation time or maternity leave...and that's exactly what you need and deserve, right? <3
Aug. 25th, 2011 10:51 pm (UTC)
I agree with the above. You don't need to feel guilty about not writing every day. Write when you can and when you have it in you. If you're just trying to cram writing into your day no matter what, you're not going to produce good work or be very into what you're doing.

My $0.02! :)
( 3 comments — Leave a comment )

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